Below are the 12 most recent journal entries recorded in quidproquo84's LiveJournal:

Saturday, February 4th, 2006
1:21 am	goofing off with my brothers; I love them; they're crazy... now find myself settled in front of the screen... how crazy. (Comment on this)
Thursday, January 26th, 2006
4:20 pm	After After a marble of rain trailed her stone cheek unmoved handprints, initials at her cracked feet (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, January 16th, 2006
12:21 pm	Cruel Cruel Two red folds were all that were left of her eyes. They did not laugh But coldly watched, as she tried to swim back into the darkness. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, January 10th, 2006
5:52 pm	Does anyone remember when the internet was interesting? When it wasn't just another commodity? Good lord, what happened to those days? (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, January 5th, 2006
10:15 am	Commitment back! For my holiday festivities I visited Miami and then an epic five days in New York City. NYC was amazing. I met up with a friend who I think the world of. We've gone through a lot the past two and some years. Ups, downs, ups, downs. I broke the news to him this trip that I felt it would be wrong for me to move to Las Vegas next year. The plan of me possibly moving to Vegas has been one that, although up in the air, was something I know both of us thought about. It takes a lot to justify moving for someone, to try out some "thing". I was in my child psychological methods class yesterday, and the teacher thought it would be fun to conduct an 'anonymous' survey with the premise "Men who take Child Development courses are more likely to be better husbands". Of course, it was a joke to point out flaws worth avoiding in surveying and experimental design. The funny thing about the test, was there were only two men in the class. Those who marked true: I like children - 2 I like to cook - 1 Cleaning the toilet bowl is fun - 0 I would consider dating multiple people - 1 I like buying cute gifts for my friends - 2 I enjoy watching Opera - 0 I am not afraid of commitment - 1 So naturally it was funny save the last question. My fear of commitment, like many in my position I suppose, is rooted in a fear of missing out, a fear of it hindering me from finding myself. At 21, I feel there is a lot to be concerned about in entering a relationship. The guy I went to NYC with is 40, and the last boyfriend I had was/is 40. There is a lot to be concerned about in any distance, whether it be age, physical distance, the distance created by time, or even the more subtle distances of past and lifestyle that may include religion, culture, etc.. I think time-- that is finding a comfort in how much or little (and how so) one invests in another-- is the largest hurdle (at least the one that seems to find me at my most insecure). I'm not entirely sure where I'll end up physically this year, although that kind of a change is something I desire. I'm thinking about moving up to San Francisco. We'll see. Mike (Comment on this)
Thursday, December 22nd, 2005
9:44 pm	Where Once We Burned Tomorrow on a plane to Florida. Wednesday a plane to NYC. The day after I get back, start classes; my final quarter at Cal Poly. Where Once We Burned I walked into a field, once black (Everything seemed to burn then) The red-eyed crows had flown away despite the empty crosses that had held countless dolls, now ash It was like a dream where white birds carried back artifacts, all yours an olive brance, a postcard-- not addressed and one did not return at all Silence. A white sheet, it slowly crept across the blue. I wrapped it in my arms A mother with fresh laundry, to carry to the sun Naked feet, and arms outstretched the white sheet, fibers in the white-light sun ... It was morning in the field so it was morning creeping in a room, you called safe I did not know, how you loved So I confess, you came into wakefulness with my lover's eyes with a wordless look upon his neck, and sleeping form (he did so easily fit inside your arms, that it had become timeless) You took him in, this morning as the sun takes in the sky a drop of light that pulls the black tides into the day. And in this dream you smiled a thousand burning fields could not break the dawn. (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, December 19th, 2005
2:08 pm	a couple days rest Finally. The week I've been waiting for. Two weeks ago I had finals, last week I worked 50 hours, and this week... nothing. Free of work, free of school, free of everything until Friday when I leave for Florida and later NYC to spend Christmas with family and friends. I've started in on Wicked. It's a pretty good read, although not a 'light' read. Highly political. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, December 9th, 2005
7:40 pm	Sea Snail Sea Snail As water retreats to darker chambers he spiraled inside where unseen conflict cuts at him sand heaved from his ritual came down like snow around him through memory's veil I watched as he disappeared into The ocean floor (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, December 5th, 2005
6:00 pm	warmth Twelve days until my career at work (a department store) is finally over. In spite of the usual complaints I have of work, I still had a great time. My co-workers were all similar in that they all had crazy, interesting personalities (whether for better or for worse). Last night I went to the store party, which eventually ended up (for me) back at a person's apartment. All of us inebriated, sitting around singing with a guitar. The songs were all from our generation (we were all late teens to mid twenties), Third Eye Blind, Nirvana, Weezer, Foo Fighters, Counting Crows... it was surreal, and I think the reason it felt so surreal was becuz it was quite similar to a past experience at a writer's conference I got to attend last year. There, I distinctly remember all of us, again inebriated (although a lot can be said about the generational gap there, given the type of substance :-) ) singing to songs. The crowd at the conference ranged from 21 to mid sixties (most in their forties and fifties). The songs sung of course were from their generation: Elton John, Johnny Cash, the Beatles, the Eagles... well, long story short, it was essentially the same experience, the same gain, the same type of bonding, lightly painted by some minor generational and cultural differences. Something about the blatancy of these two experiences combined is warming. Current Music: The Cure - Disintegration (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, December 2nd, 2005
8:43 am	Echo (For Sean) OK, long due for an update. I feel sort of timid posting with this anonymous name, but that's cool. A little about me, I'm a 21 year old student at Cal Poly in California. I'm majoring in Liberal Studies with a minor in Psychology. I graduate in Winter. Hopefully I'll go on to grad school. I want to get my masters in Psychology or Social Work (or even Child Development). Last night I had a wonderful dream. I was with a couple friends, and one of their kids. He was afraid of chairs. You were settling down, the lights were off, and a straight guy named Keevoh and I were in the kitchen. I said goodnight, and he did too, then we hugged and held each other. My head rested on his chest, and right then and there I knew (and knew he knew) that I just wanted to be held, and that he wanted to hold someone. It was a good dream. Echo (for Sean) Echo you move through me without touch the fragments lift, resume but you linger the words stop dumbfounded where once you bridged there is no gravity here no wet, heavy tears no ritual sacrifice to mark the new moon (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, November 23rd, 2005
6:25 pm	Miscarriage Went to Vegas this past weekend. Besides being drunk off my ass, I got to see Dennis Miller and Dane Cook at the comedy festival. Miscarriage (2005) a week will pass and I will tread water the earth will spin beneath my feet a Jesus Walker seven strides night and day like blind wind will pass through oak with fleeting awe I will cut through a thousand nights a thousand lifetimes but she time does not pass her as it passes me she is caught in still water it surrounds, consumes her white body drowned eyes she enters me as light from window wanders into darkness with yellow, tired eyes beyond the needlework of my night and of my day loss the unreflecting surface consumes time itself (Comment on this)
Sunday, November 13th, 2005
8:52 pm	Reminder Reminder [2004] Underneath the yellow shade In the corner of his eye With the posters hanging tight On the creaking wall, I lie. Beneath the shadowed surface Which I cannot seem to breach As we sink into the bed With his lips, I never reach. So the scale begins to fall Its descent into the floor With a burning eye that trails To the ceiling, needing more (Comment on this)